Good Day

I had a really good day today. Not your typical good day full of sunshine and roses. In fact it's quite dreary outside today. The idea that San Diego is constantly sunny and seventy degrees is not true. Okay it is usually seventy degrees but June is known for it's gloom here.

No it wasn't a day full of sunshine, certainly not a good hair day, I didn't even wake up to a great cup of coffee. In fact I wouldn't even call it an easy day. Once again my body is in pain. I spent an hour on the phone with the credit card company disputing a fraudulent charge. And really, my hair just doesn't look good today. But a good day nonetheless. Good because there's something going on inside of me. A shift of sorts. A shift in my body, a shift in my heart, a shift in Grandmother Earth that I am a part of. I had a really intense massage. My therapist could feel it to. He said that he could feel something moving around in my heart space. Moving around so much that he could feel it vibrating. I am grateful to those around me who have the strength and the knowing to witness this shift and to those who help facilitate it. We are all connected.

There is a lot going on in my heart. It is a journey for me to be true to what is there. A small part of me is against the shift, doesn't want to change and would rather get caught up in things that don't hold any significance and take the easier road. A bigger part of me wants to turn towards the shift, say yes to it and all of it's love, pain and mystery. Take the higher, harder road. As I write about saying yes the sun that I haven't seen all day shines through the stain glass window of the Ideal Hotel where I sit and creates a burst of light. More shiny things. My tears created this moment!

There is a quote that I'm going to butcher here because I don't have it in front of me but it says something about how it is not our darkness that we are afraid of but our light. I find this to be entirely true. I am familiar with my darkness, even friends with it. It is my light that I am discovering daily. It is the idea that I am powerful beyond measure that scares me, and still, I say yes. Yes to the shift, yes to the Earth and yes to a good day.